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Alex Douglas-Kane shares her experiences and understanding of Discover Nature Awareness

Thursday, 18 February 2010

Why was she not pleased with his commitment to their relationship?

I once worked with a guy who took part in Meet a Tree. Having arrived the evening before under the influence and was now in detox, John from what I can remember wanted to take part in Nature Awareness even though there was no need for him to do so. I remember he really engaged with the game and at the end having found his tree appeared to be overjoyed with his experience.

It wasn't until some months later that I found out how much of an impact finding his tree had on him. During a gathering of patients past and present he had brought his wife along, and he had enrolled them both on the Nature Awareness activity I was running on that day. He introduced his wife to me, he was very excited and he was telling how much the experience had meant to him in terms of his active recovery he felt he would not return to drink ever again and he was keen for his wife experience the game as well. I looked at her face and I can only tell you what I think her expression was saying. It said to me that she would believe it when she sees it; felt that she was just waiting for him to relapse again, as that is what normally happens?

So off they set, he as her sight guide he was almost childlike as he seemed very excited, on their return I took his wife through the process of sending her out to find her tree, and off she went not looking to keen to do it. On her return she said that she had not found her tree and that was that, it was all very matter of fact.

I felt that John wanted his wife to share in his experience, so that they would have that common connection and that she would understand how he was feeling now, for her it did not work and in a way maybe she did not want it to work.

What do I mean by that? Well, recently I was working with some friends in the same field and a situation arouse which took me back to that day several years ago, I suddenly made a different connection to what might have been going on for her. She did not want him to get better because if he did, perhaps there would be nothing left of their relationship, as she may have, dare I say using him a a drug and if he fixed himself so to speak, she would have nothing?

Who knows what was happening only they really know? I can only trust that I am completely wrong and that they have found their Love again and are truly making a good life for themselves.

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